How Many Ambitions Have You Put Aside In Your Life?

Have you ever felt like you have untapped potential inside, and you are seriously underplaying that talent and skill on the outside? Do you play yourself down to make other people comfortable? Or maybe you have team members who play themselves down, you can see how much potential they have – but they will not acknowledge or own it. 

So many people have more inside them than they are willing to expose to the world. They are fearful, scared, lost, confused… they just cannot make the shift. If the change into being more of who you are was as simple as flicking a switch, and letting the light out, I am sure that you and many other people will have done so already. 

Because, you cannot make a change like this without understanding what is happening on an unconscious level. First comes awareness, then comes the unveiling of the potential.

So, let’s dig into a client of mines story, to really understand.

I have a client who, to me, is a beautiful, smart and career driven woman. The problem is, she hides and represses these ‘amazing’ parts of self into her unconscious. She won’t outwardly take ownership of how incredible she is. She doesn’t believe she is any of these things. 

She projects the image of an ‘average girl’ – she dresses moderately, won’t speak out of turn, has strong people pleasing traits, is nice to everyone and is just that nice person to be around. In her career, she takes no great leaps and strides, she is the turtle that methodically plods along. She has a good, average career, but it is not where she dreamed it would be by now, she has been stuck in the same place for the past 3 years.

You see, for her, stepping out and playing it big means that she would be going against everything that she has ever been taught, and everything she has unconsciously taken on from her family and her tribe. To play it big would mean she would have to challenge all the people that have accepted that she is just the girl that ‘plods along’. The one that stays quiet. That won’t challenge the status quo. 

For her to rise, she would have to be willing to shake shit up quite frankly. And has never ever wanted to shake anything up.

Let me explain… 

When my client was growing up she was pretty, popular, athletic and smart. Her sister was a bit overweight, had terrible skin, was not confident and had low self-worth. Her parents had middle class jobs, and they never wanted much more than that. 

When my client went to high school she became top of the class, boys were attracted to her, and she became one of the top athletes. Did her parents praise her? No. Every time she got up the top, they knocked her back down a peg or ten. “Don’t be so arrogant”, “Don’t make your sister feel bad about herself”, “Don’t get too big for your boots”, “It’s not OK to make others feel bad about themselves”, “Don’t do that”. Basically, they all became uncomfortable on an unconscious level with her gifts and talents and wanted her ‘light’ to go away, so they didn’t have to deal with their own lack of ambition, and their own low self-worth.

They taught her that she needed to be average, so that other people were comfortable around her. 

The main belief systems my client was taught were -

“I need to make other people comfortable”

“My gifts and talents cause conflict with those around me”

“If I reach my potential, I will be abandoned”

“I only get love when other people feel OK about themselves” 

What this meant was a lifetime of then pushing her ‘Gifted Child’ part into her unconscious – because it was a threat to her stability, safety and ability to receive love. Instead, she had to become the ‘Average Student’ of life. Never really making waves. Never speaking out. Never owning what she always has known is inside. 

All her life, the special parts of her were outcast, and so she ended up outcasting these parts to her unconscious, where they could not be seen anymore.

What needs to happen now, is awareness and inner work with these parts to bring them out. 

When she can do this, it means that she will be able to start to outshine the others around her, and start ALLOWING herself to move up in the world.  

Always leading from the front,

Gab 

If you know that you cap your potential and would like to understand your unconscious triggers, you can join us in our group ‘The Collective’  

We run a live coaching session with a person chosen from the group every Thursday evening at 8pm EST. You can message us and let us know you would like to be worked with! 

You can also book in a free 30min Coach Chat to let us unblock you!

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