How Little Respect Do You Have For Yourself?

I have had 3 clients in the space of one day come to me with the same issue. They cannot connect with their anger and are letting people treat them like shit.

It is making me angry FOR THEM.

I do not know how many times that I have people coming to me telling me that they do not know how to stand up to someone that is walking all over them. They feel guilty. They feel responsible. And they most of all are so fearful of rocking the boat and upsetting the status quo.

“Oh, but what if they don’t like me”

“Please like me”

“I cannot handle them retaliating or reacting”

I can’t talk, I only recently just overcame this pattern.

But what this is, is a deep fear of rejection and a lack of boundaries.

What it is saying is; you can treat me however you like, I have no boundaries on how I am treated, people can walk all over me, I let everyone and anyone into my life, I want to be the ‘good person’ that loves everyone, it isn’t OK to talk back.

A LACK OF ANGER = A LACK OF BOUNDARIES.

One client today recognised that literally her only boundary on who she will let in her life is if there is physical abuse. Another client had a ‘friend’ send a passively nasty message and was upset and still wanted her to be her friend. And the last client has a friend bossing her around, telling her what to do, and she cannot stand up for herself.

All clear lack of boundaries. A big part of their personality, ‘the good girl’, wants them to be liked, loved and ACCEPTED by everybody. Which is beautiful, but can be totally dysfunctional in your life without any awareness.

One of my clients never had anger role modelled for them by their parents – their parents were extremely passive, one of my clients was bullied so wants everyone to like them, and the other client was severely introverted and a loner at school and so feels excluded and disconnected from anger. 

These are all unconscious beliefs and patterns that play out. And without understanding them, you will never connect to anger, you will never have boundaries and you will always feel like other people have the power and that you are the victim to them. 

If you want to change, connect to your anger, know what you deserve and use your power to make a stand for yourself.

Always leading from the front,

Gab

PS: If you’re interested, here are 3 ways we can help you make these changes for yourself or those you lead:

1. Come along to our LIVE workshop – The Power of You - on the Northern Beaches of Sydney

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2. Join the Ignite Coaching Inner Circle and learn the skills to coach, motivate and lead the people around you to their highest potential.

It’s our free Facebook community where like-minded individuals come to grow and connect – Click Here  

3. Book in a free 30min Coach Chat and let us unblock you!

This is a free, no obligation session where we work on removing the blocks that are holding you back from moving forward and making a real difference in your life and in the lives of the people around you – Click Here